Waiting On Time
by Anthony Douglas Gere
I guess the time has come for me to really realize what time it is. For so long I have
so wanted, but waited to say these things, and realized I was waiting for the right
moment or should I say the right and correct time to do so. Maybe I wasn't really
waiting for the right time, but for the right reason and or the one and only right person
to receive this message I have held on to for so long, and so tight in my grasp over
the many years. I think that through the course of time and in my life, I have dreamed
and memorized this scripted speech, that is and has been perfected through proper
grammar and verbalization for the telling to someone for shock value or to impress.
But now, this moment that I have been waiting for that seems like forever and a day,
seems right to recite. But the problem is, the words and catchy phrases now have
no meaning and maybe I need to update it to improve this perfected letter. I say this
because they mean so much more now than they did before. They have a new
meaning and though the words are basically the same, the definition is more real,
more intense and refined. Now I consider myself a pretty good communicator, but
right now, nothing seems to fit in terms of giving my emotions and feelings its proper
due or respect with a speech I have prepared or could re-write for this special
person. It is as though that what I once thought was great, is now just okay, and
what I thought was love so it seemed, is now a infatuation of the make believe. What
once seemed beautiful and enticing, is now a shadow or silhouette of what I see and
view now. I remember wanting to have this and that and showing the world my
power in materialistic ways, but now it seems more gratifying being powerless to
this woman and force that has over taken my life and meaning for living. Yes my
friends, I now know love. I now can tell you about this feeling without saying a word.
It is in my way of walking, talking and interacting with life. This is not in a script or
something I have practiced, but a spur of the moment reaction to the action that has
given me joy. Its like I am sharing the ultimate River Dance, or singing the opera to
one specific person in a pack theater. I am in love and could not be happier, and will
try to explain, if I can.
I remember when I felt good, felt blessed to have something, but now I have
everything and it has nothing to do with appearance or a cosmetic image. Now don't
get me wrong in the slightest, the vision of this woman and image I am viewing is all
that and then some, but I am seeing pass the image, I am seeing my future in a
dimension that has only recently developed in my realm of perspective and
understanding. I truly feel that this avenue will beautifully grow, stay alive and allow
for me to prosper in my efforts and studies only if I give to it what it gives to me, hope,
honesty and a full clarity of the truth and its opposite. My cravings are now needs, my
wants are no longer desires, but daily requirements to survive in this love. I am so
overwhelmed that I am calm in my approach to everything. The world has become a
more happier place, but I am cautious on the negative affects it can bring into my
world that has only us two in it, and many around it. Nothing else matters, though
everything little thing means something. Each flaw is now an perfection, and each
scar now a landmark alerting me on how to handle it when I come close to it and it
tries to drift far away from me. You see it has taken me years to feel this, and the
build up is worth every minute and more. All of the heartaches, the lies, broken
promises, cheating, settling and my own personal doings in a negative way has
primed me for this moment, I am ready and able. All of the detours and short cuts
have channeled me to this moment and person. I am stronger even though I am
weak at the knees when I see her. My thoughts that come out when I speak,, not
jumbled when we speak on the phone. My broad vocabulary now limited to three
words, I Love You, when I think of her. I no longer think of myself, but think of her and
pleasing her beyond her own understanding and definition of love. I want to shower
her with a bubble bath of happiness, make love to her when we are sleep together to
only act upon it passionately when we wake. I want to make her cry when she
smiles and thinks of me. I want to hold her, allow her to feel the way she touches my
heart and provide a safe haven for her to grow so she can bring me up with her. I am
hungry to cook for her, quick to take my time in allowing her to understand me and
will do nothing short of everything to love her. I am in love and could not be happier if
I wanted because I am not in control, and will try to explain if I can.
by Anthony Douglas Gere
I guess the time has come for me to really realize what time it is. For so long I have
so wanted, but waited to say these things, and realized I was waiting for the right
moment or should I say the right and correct time to do so. Maybe I wasn't really
waiting for the right time, but for the right reason and or the one and only right person
to receive this message I have held on to for so long, and so tight in my grasp over
the many years. I think that through the course of time and in my life, I have dreamed
and memorized this scripted speech, that is and has been perfected through proper
grammar and verbalization for the telling to someone for shock value or to impress.
But now, this moment that I have been waiting for that seems like forever and a day,
seems right to recite. But the problem is, the words and catchy phrases now have
no meaning and maybe I need to update it to improve this perfected letter. I say this
because they mean so much more now than they did before. They have a new
meaning and though the words are basically the same, the definition is more real,
more intense and refined. Now I consider myself a pretty good communicator, but
right now, nothing seems to fit in terms of giving my emotions and feelings its proper
due or respect with a speech I have prepared or could re-write for this special
person. It is as though that what I once thought was great, is now just okay, and
what I thought was love so it seemed, is now a infatuation of the make believe. What
once seemed beautiful and enticing, is now a shadow or silhouette of what I see and
view now. I remember wanting to have this and that and showing the world my
power in materialistic ways, but now it seems more gratifying being powerless to
this woman and force that has over taken my life and meaning for living. Yes my
friends, I now know love. I now can tell you about this feeling without saying a word.
It is in my way of walking, talking and interacting with life. This is not in a script or
something I have practiced, but a spur of the moment reaction to the action that has
given me joy. Its like I am sharing the ultimate River Dance, or singing the opera to
one specific person in a pack theater. I am in love and could not be happier, and will
try to explain, if I can.
I remember when I felt good, felt blessed to have something, but now I have
everything and it has nothing to do with appearance or a cosmetic image. Now don't
get me wrong in the slightest, the vision of this woman and image I am viewing is all
that and then some, but I am seeing pass the image, I am seeing my future in a
dimension that has only recently developed in my realm of perspective and
understanding. I truly feel that this avenue will beautifully grow, stay alive and allow
for me to prosper in my efforts and studies only if I give to it what it gives to me, hope,
honesty and a full clarity of the truth and its opposite. My cravings are now needs, my
wants are no longer desires, but daily requirements to survive in this love. I am so
overwhelmed that I am calm in my approach to everything. The world has become a
more happier place, but I am cautious on the negative affects it can bring into my
world that has only us two in it, and many around it. Nothing else matters, though
everything little thing means something. Each flaw is now an perfection, and each
scar now a landmark alerting me on how to handle it when I come close to it and it
tries to drift far away from me. You see it has taken me years to feel this, and the
build up is worth every minute and more. All of the heartaches, the lies, broken
promises, cheating, settling and my own personal doings in a negative way has
primed me for this moment, I am ready and able. All of the detours and short cuts
have channeled me to this moment and person. I am stronger even though I am
weak at the knees when I see her. My thoughts that come out when I speak,, not
jumbled when we speak on the phone. My broad vocabulary now limited to three
words, I Love You, when I think of her. I no longer think of myself, but think of her and
pleasing her beyond her own understanding and definition of love. I want to shower
her with a bubble bath of happiness, make love to her when we are sleep together to
only act upon it passionately when we wake. I want to make her cry when she
smiles and thinks of me. I want to hold her, allow her to feel the way she touches my
heart and provide a safe haven for her to grow so she can bring me up with her. I am
hungry to cook for her, quick to take my time in allowing her to understand me and
will do nothing short of everything to love her. I am in love and could not be happier if
I wanted because I am not in control, and will try to explain if I can.